I’ve been asking this question for a long time: What does Paris Hilton have that made her a such a huge celebrity? It’s definitely not her acting skills(I actually cheered when her character got impaled in the head with a pipe in a scene in “House Of Wax”). Singing skills? Nah. Even our tone-deaf drunk neighbor can sing “Stars Are Blind” better than her. It’s definitely NOT her cocksucking skills because she needs to work on that too from what I saw in her sex video. The answer: The goddamn media. They will shove their idea of a “celebrity” down people’s throats until they agree with them, no matter how untalented the people they are trying to hype are.

Don’t believe me? Just ask Kris Aquino.

"All those Herpes rumors are so totally not true!"

So the Cultural Center of the Philippines (CCP) decided to close down the controversial “Kulo” art exhibit in their main gallery. This comes after the exhibit got vandalized & both CCP officials & artists alike started receiving threats. Hell, some idiot even tried setting the exhibit on fire but failed. For those of you who are not aware, “Kulo” is an art exhibit that features a mixed media collage entitled “Politeismo”(Polytheism) which shows Catholic imagery juxtaposed with items like condoms, pictures of politicians & women in underwear, images of Jesus with a red clown nose & Mickey Mouse ears or with his eyes bleeding black ink but the most controversial of which is an image of Jesus with a wooden penis attached to it. That’s right folks, arson is OK but blasphemy is definitely a no-no.

What’s funny though is that “Politeismo” has been on exhibit since 2002 in different venues like Ateneo de Manila & the UP Vargas Musueum & the collective outrage only started when it was covered in the news by a major network. The resulting backlash comes as no surprise since the majority of Filipinos are Catholics & I’m pretty sure that aside from the threats & vandalism, the CCP may have also succumbed to pressure from some public officials & religious groups.

Although most Filipinos find it appalling to have a wooden dick glued to a picture of Christ, what’s more disturbing is the fact that for a supposed Catholic country, the Philippines:

• Ranks as one of the worst in Asia in terms corruption.
• Ranks fifth out of 46 countries when it comes to murder with firearms.
• Ranks 6th out of 65 countries when it comes to manslaughter.

But hey, at least we placed third out of 53 countries when it comes to Church attendance!

Sometimes I’d wonder: How many of those who regularly attend mass in Quiapo Church also routinely violate traffic laws, or steal office supplies, or have mistresses, or host a child porn website? I’m pretty sure those same people would be whining & complaining if they ever saw “Kulo” because it offends their Catholic sensibilities. By the way, Jesus better not even think of driving away those vendors at Quiapo Church like he did at the Temple in Jerusalem unless he wants the living shit beaten out of him or get a second stab wound in his side. Or both.

The CCP opened the “Kulo” exhibit to commemorate Dr. Jose Rizal’s 150th birthday & I think it’s only fitting because one of the things he did when he was alive was point out the hypocrisy & abuses of the Catholic Church, which is also one of the key messages of the exhibit. Sadly, this message is lost among its critics & detractors. For what it’s worth, “Kulo” has succeeded in exposing the ugly, despicable, festering side of Catholicism which its die-hard followers refuse to see & how Catholicism has become a joke in this country.

Rizal would’ve been proud.

Sometimes you’ve got to wonder what was going on inside his head when he shot that poor guy just because of some traffic altercation. This asshole probably listens to too much Tupac & has seen New Jack City too many times that he thinks he’s living in some East Coast ghetto & poppin’ caps in people’s asses validates his “Thug Life” existence. That mindset is probably the reason why he shot it out with the cops when they cornered him like a mouse in the basement of his mother’s house. Or it may be because he knows that he’s become so notorious & hated that a lot of inmates would want nothing more than make him their own personal bitch when he finally goes to jail.

Now if only someone could get a video of him getting sodomized in prison then justice would already be half-served.

Scott Janke & his porn star wife Anabela.

Janke has told the Associated Press that he & his wife “have done nothing to be embarrassed about” & had their “heads held high” amidst the controversy. He will receive a severance package worth six months salary, which totals about $50,000 plus health benefits.

As noble as the PNP’s intentions are, it’s overshadowed by its cheap imitation of a movie character. I guess the message the PNP is trying to convey is that it’s better to be perceived as copycats than to be perceived as corrupt, big-bellied, trigger-happy scalawags.

I WON’T buy that for a dollar.

Copyright infringement alert: Onlookers ogle the PNP's Pinoy "Robocop"

Michael Jackson has gained immortality. Just don’t expect him to rise from the grave & dance with a gang of zombies anytime soon.

Okay, okay, it’s not exactly a disease but apparently everybody’s seem to have caught it like a STD from a cheap prostitute because it’s the hottest Korean TV series(or “Koreanovela”) today. It’s a remake of the original “Meteor Garden” series from Taiwan, which makes me wonder even more why people are still going crazy over BOF like it was the most original & most groundbreaking Asian TV drama series that has ever been made. Oh yeah I forgot, it has cute boys in it.

“Boys Over Flowers” is worse than Swine Flu for the following reasons:

5. It gives the false notion that underprivileged women can bag handsome rich guys

Right. This should be as common as a rich night club patron falling in love & marrying one of the GROs. I’m not saying that it’s impossible for underprivileged girls to marry rich young bachelors, it’s just that it very rarely happens. Besides, most young, good-looking rich guys are either only interested in banging as many chicks as possible, or already have girlfriends who are also filthy rich, or are gay.

4. Recurring themes that have been done to death

Okay let’s see…

- Poor girl meets spoiled rich boy in unusual circumstances: CHECK.

- Spoiled rich boy falls in love with poor girl: CHECK

- Rich boy’s mean, domineering mother/father disapproves of their relationship & does everything to keep them apart: CHECK.

- Rich boy’s parents want him to be married to a pretty rich girl, but they don’t know she’s a two-faced, scheming, manipulative bitch: CHECK.

- Poor girl & rich boy beat all the odds & live happily ever after: CHECK.

Wow, I wonder how many times the aforementioned scenarios have been played out in various Koreanovelas? You can change some of the minor details, but the main themes have always been the same. Not only is the “Rich-boy-falls-in-love-with-poor-girl-and-despite-overwhelming-odds-they-still-end-up-with-each-other-and-live-happily-ever-after” scenario hard to believe, it’s also getting a little old.

3. It’s been recycled over & over again

Boys Over Flowers(or Hana Yori Dango, as it was originally called) started off as a manga in Japan in 1992 & was adapted into TV series by Taiwan, Japan & Korea. Hell, next thing you know there will be a Pakistani or a Somalian version. I mean, how many times do you have to remake, repackage, regurgitate & feed a drama series to the masses before they say “What the fuck?!” & storm your TV station with torches & pitchforks wanting to lynch the producers?

On the other hand, maybe the TV networks have realized the impact of climate change & have decided to go “green” by recycling everything, including old TV shows. If that was the case, then they’re more deserving of a Nobel Prize than Al Gore for being such great environmentalists.

2. You don’t know if your girlfriend or wife fantasizes about one of the male lead stars when you’re having sex

In the heat of a passionate lovemaking session nothing instantly kills a guy’s raging boner than his woman suddenly blurting out someone else’s name, especially if it’s one of the BOF male stars. How would you react if your chick screams “Ji Hoo!!!” as she reaches the big O? Sure it would hurt your ego & masculinity, but you wouldn’t know whether to punch her in the uterus or laugh.

And here’s the Number 1 reason why Boys Over Flowers is worse than Swine Flu…

1. It’s NOT from North Korea

With the local airwaves being flooded with the same old cheesy, generic TV shows from South Korea, wouldn’t it be nice to have a Koreanovela from their nuke-obsessed neighbor that shows us how awesome their dictator Kim Jong Il is & what great joy it is to be under his authoritarian rule? Think about it: There’s great potential for hilarity from a North Korean drama series because propaganda can be funny. It may even be funnier than Bollywood action films.

Boys Over Flowers: Worse than Swine Flu

I was supposed to let the Hayden Kho-ntroversy die a natural death but certain events in the Senate Hearing last Friday compelled me to write something about it again, like some former policeman-turned tabloid reporter pouring a bottle of mineral water over Hayden Kho’s head before the start of the hearing. Real classy.

This reminds me of the verse in John 8:7 where Jesus asked the crowd to throw the first stone at a woman accused of adultery, but apparently the ex-cop/tabloid reporter thinks he’s better than Dr. Kho because he has never used his badge to extort money from anyone nor used his uniform to get free rides on public transportation during his career as an officer of the law.

I’ve said this before & I’ll say it again: Hayden Kho’s sex videos, which made their way to the internet, were supposed to be private. Neither Hayden Kho, his mother, Katrina Halili nor anyone involved wanted those videos to come out & I still DON’T believe that Katrina Halili nor any of the other women were not aware that they were being filmed. Some groups hate Dr. Kho so much because of the controversy that they distrubuted anti-Hayden Kho t-shirts to people present at the hearing. Now we have another allegation which surfaced during the Senate hearing about Katrina Halili introducing Hayden Kho to Ecstasy pills. So where’s their hostility & outrage over that?

Just a reminder to these “holier-than-thou” people who want Hayden Kho crucified: Jesus hates hypocrites.

I love it when Karma comes back to bite the guilty in the ass.

Apparently, that’s what happened to sexy starlet Katrina Halili & actor/model/cosmetic surgeon Dr.Haydon Kho, when a video of them engaging in “bedroom acrobatics” have surfaced, along with other videos of Dr. Kho banging other women. Both were already in serious relationships with other people when the video was made, with Dr.Kho being popularly known as the boyfriend of Dr.Vicky Belo, cosmetic surgeon to the stars & a celebrity in her own right.

The controversy surrounding the leaked sex videos reached fever pitch on Wednesday when Ms. Halili went to the NBI(National Bureau of Investigation) & filed charges against Dr. Kho, blaming him for spreading the sex videos & portraying herself as the victim but the truth is she’s the victim of her own dishonesty & stupidy. I mean, in this day & age of Youtube, Facebook, Rapidshare & countless internet messageboards did she really expect videos which she allowed to be taken of her banging some guy to NOT reach the internet? Now we have Senator Ramon “Bong” Revilla Jr. doing what politicians do best–acting like hypocrites–by calling Hayden Kho a “pervert” & threatening to revoke his license. Wow. I mean, this is coming from a guy whose dad, former Senator Ramon Revilla Sr., was such a notorious philandering horndog during his day that he has allegedly fathered 100 children with different women. At least Hayden Kho wore a condom.

In my opinion they can’t charge Hayden Kho with anything. This controversy was just a case of videos made by consenting adults for private viewing getting leaked on the internet & the reason people want him punished is simply because he’s a stud who can easily get women.

Okay, now that I’m done ranting click the links below to download the Hayden Kho-llection of videos:

Katrina Halili Scandal(.MP4 format, 53.53 MB)

Maricar Reyes Scandal Part 1(.3gp format, 36.76 MB)

Maricar Reyes Scandal Part 2(.3gp format, 39.64 MB)

Brazilian Model Scandal(.3gp format, 13.90 MB)

Oh, and you’re welcome.